The Indian head massage course.

I went on my Indian head massage course only a few days ago… And it did make me feel that I have archived something, that I seldom do, for a change I feel that I am on the right path, I know what I want to do with my life at the moment.

My day started very early and lucky for me that Fox drove me to Potter Street in Harlow to get the 501 to Brentwood Essex, the journey was long and full of School kids, Lucky I remembered to fully charge my Ipod, so listened to music for the whole of the Journey which took almost an Hour, I got to Brentwood in plenty of time well nearly an Hour and fifteen mins early.

The journey out to Brentwood was actually quite nice, takes in Epping, Ongar lots of countryside b roads really nice even saw lots of goats, sheep and chickens, and it was a lovely sunny morning as well makes a journey all the more worth while.

But strict conduct and dress code you had to be at the Institute 30-15 mins early for Induction and of course the Introductions for some reason I hate Introductions having to talk about your self hopes and dreams etc.

The class was a modest size of seven souls six of them being females and me the only guy haha just the same for the Reflexology only then it was ten women to one guy.

Everyone was sat in the Students lounge, all spaced apart as if it was a teenage disco guys on one side girls on the other, my bench trousers laying loosely at my bum, I smile at one girl she asks if I’m here for the IHM (Indian head massage), I smile back and answer yes great she says so am I. Then another says me too, and me yeah me as well. I count four heads; two are still to join us.

The class room is long and wide chairs sit around a large desks pressed against the wall, a projector sits above our heads, and a Air conditioner directly behind us, its cold and I mean cold air blowing on our backs well the ones directly in front of it, as the day progresses its turned on and off as and when needed, the room gets so hot with out it something to do with the business below us.

Our tutor enters the room says Ladies and of course Gentlemen I will be your teacher today you can call me Michele, she gives the spin and lets us know how much she looking forward to working and teaching us.

The lesson starts with one girl being the teachers test dummy and she shows us the first part of the IHM, Tuning in awaking the charkas crown forehead and neck then the laying on of hands and the neck stretch and shoulders and off we go.

Surprisingly the day was actually quite quick, I tended to get on well with the other students, thought no numbers or emails changed hands except for Michele who gave me her email, seems I made an impression, maybe its because I have had many years of reflexology so my technique is very good.

I did my test on Fiona, who happens to be the boss of the institute being an odd number and 4 were doing the test at the same time, after the relaxing start, I did the treatment with in 20 mins I could feel Fiona, chest lift and drop, and a soft noise coming from her lips, she was fast asleep, Michele was opened mouthed and Impressed by my handling of the boss.

Needless to say I got my Diploma, and now have to work on my NVQ in the coming next few weeks the quicker I do this the better really, thought I can charge for it but if I need people to practice on, I cant really charge anything for it unless of course they are going to give me a donation which would be nice but I’m not holding my breath since most people are tight with cash.

The next step is to get my NVQ for the Reflexology and that should be a blast since I already can do that type of treatment a lot of experience but no qualification to show for it, but that’s something I might look for a bit of help on.

Poor England!

What a start to a week, England dumped or humped out of the world cup, Ok I’m a Scot’s man and all that, but my family are English and did I feel for them with what happened on the field of dreams nay I tell you the field of Nightmares. Germany did not just give England a bloody nose they made England look like a bunch of Sunday armatures, I think you can say with out a shadow of doubt England was Lucky it was only 4, I felt for James he did so well, and was by far the best England player on the day even if he had let 4 goals in, it could have been much much worse.

I got to sign on this week, and was wondering if I should ask to do the seetek course again I found it helpful that last time I did it and also you get free tea and its quite social as well since more or less every one on the same boat as me, well maybe not the same boat I have got my Indian head massage course coming up in the next few weeks and I have been studying the book I got from Amazon for only £5 Including P&P which normally retails for £15 hoot!

But the reason for Seetek is they have so much facilities that I can use, and all the help that I could ever want and its all free, music to a poor mans ears if you ask me.

And for 12 weeks it keeps the DSS off my back completely which is a bonus still I have to sign on every fortnight which is no hardship but, its in and out when you tell them your doing Seetek, all part of my motives in doing what I want, and now I qualifies for £750 for the course I cannot afford sports massage, if I was working I would never had done it but circumstances dictate that I move along a different path to what I once had known, still its health but I will be my own boss fingers crossed.

Well I have enrolled myself at the cost of £199 to do a one day diploma course in Indian Head Massage course with the prospect of doing the NVQ in tandem which I think usually takes up to 8-12weeks for complication, and I have to have a client base of practice usually this is quite detailed but the good thing with the diploma is I can charge for my services, thought I would think that for the first few months I be just happy to get the practice so if your near to me, I do you for free, thought spaces will be taken up fast for freebies, thought they don’t know it yet my sisters and brothers are going to have electric hair and heads quite soonish haha.

Its been feeling more like summer this past week, I have spent a fair amount of time on the patio watching the birds cavort, fight and feed particularly the fountain seems to be a social point for all of them all for drinking and washing its got two tiers large birds on the bottom its wider and the small one on top which attracts the blue tits, robins, finches and well as doves.



My only problem with this is Obi yep that pirate of a dog loves to have a go at the birds not so much the little ones but doves, pigeons and crows are fair game, thought they are much faster than him and get away easy enough but Obi is getting so agile and very fast he will one day bag himself one, I will keep trying to teach him that birds are our friends but there is only so much you can teach him and his tender 7months.



Whoop the post man has been after taking Obi for a walk on me doorstep was the book I just ordered from Amazon yesterday afternoon Indian head massage by Narendra Mehta how fast is that and my booking forms and confirmation letter from Carlton institute for the course all at the same time, needless to say I’m a bit excited.



I got the fright of my life a few days ago on a walk with my faithful hound Obi, as we walked around the fields we were making our way back home again, I was in a bit of a tied mood, as we were on the long stretch home, I nearly stepped on a large 3.5-4ft snake, now I’m not scared of snakes in the least, I have had snakes as pets before, but this one just caught me so un aware it hissed so loudly I jumped back now the snake I was expecting a grass snake or one of those rare adders we have, but this guy was big slender and very black yes black! There is no black snakes in the UK I believe it to be a adult black pine snake it looks like this, my brush with the critter was over in the space of a few seconds and I did not have my camera on me, damn it I always carry a camera most of the time why did I not have it I’ll never know.

Its a monster bee!

Much to my amazement at the beauties of nature sometimes I am taken aback by something that is unexpected and down right scary, not that I find nature in the UK that scary but when I came face to face with this little fella, it made me think twice about bees.



I was doing abit of tidying in the conservatory and planting my veg patch, I keep all my baby plants in the conservatory to give them a decent start before I put them into the ground.

From behind my carrots and Onions, I could make out a large yellow face looking at me then it started to crawl over the leaves, all I could do is look in amazement and call Fox to come and have a look as I ran to grab my camera.



Turns out he or she as we found out is a European Hornet 1.5 Inch to 2.4 Inch and is not classed as aggressive if left well alone unlike our own bees that just love to sting you for the sake of it.

Been a while since I last blogged, not that I am lazy or anything like that, just been doing other things like world of warcraft, and the usual daily stuff.

Well a lot has passed over these past few weeks, I have joined much to my better judgement a paranormal group in the Essex area, who claim to be very active well its now 2 weeks with out any updates or contact?

http://www.hauntedessex.com/index.htm

Not that I was looking for a group to start with but since I moved to Sheering one thing I have noticed its very quite staying in the countryside, except for the constant droll of cars, vans. Lorries. bikes and aircraft passing over head, other than that, all I have for company is the Cockerel and the odd woof of Obi and all the dogs in the immediate area.



There is the constant and pleasing sound of all the birds which make a big difference from the seagulls of Sussex, and our bird table and feeders are eagerly taken each and every day, so much so I had to stop filling one of them because of a certain squirrel stealing all that he could get his chops around.



Our bed is falling apart, I could not describe it better than it looks like something out of Harlem NY, at the moment its got Bricks propping it up looking more like a car that’s had its wheels stolen, each morning when Fox gets up I naturally sit at the other end of the bed, we talk and obi spreads himself between us looking for hands to tickle and caress him, then it happened as fox was about to take a mouthful of tea, the bed gives way and my side of the bed hits the ground with a thud!

From laying to springing Obi is on the floor wondering what had just happened, Fox has a tea face wash, and my heart is in my mouth, funny we just been looking at new beds as well, funny how the universe works innit?

Well a little on Obi since he’s our ever loyal ever brave sir Obi, has taken to eating Sponges you know the ones you use to clean dishes and the older and dirty the better, I remarked that his poo, would be like a well chewed Milky way bar! Barff



I’m not normally one for politics but what do you think of the new PM? Not that I’m surprised or anything like that but how many arses did he have to kiss and lick to get there? And has the cheek to smile like a Jackal, for once in my life I chose not to vote, I cant stand any of them the whole lot of tax grabbing money whores, it never sits well with me and for once when I CHOSE not to vote I got what I wanted a hung parliament, well that in its self was a disappointment I expected public hanging but noooooooo!

Just goes to show you get a little bit of what you want and a hole lot more of what you don’t, now it’s the Tories turn to f**k it all up, they got a big job a head of them Lab did a damn good job of destroying the NHS, I wonder if David Cameron’s got it in him, since he has arse licked kissed his way to power?

As far as the Sheering news is concerned, the only thing to report is some bloody Husky went after Obi when I was walking him on the field last week, poor obi he slipped his collar and was off like a whippet with that massive dog hot on his heels but give Obi his dues he moved even faster than it did, my only fear was that he run on to the road, and get hit by a car but thankfully he make his way home, howling at the front door lucky fox was home at the time and they owner of the Husky kept saying sorry fella, my reaction was to say nothing, simply be cause I WANTED to rip his fucking head off, and shove his dog’s head up his arse!



Why do people let dog off a lead when they know that they are undisciplined and will not respond to commands? I know that Obi would not fully come to me when I ask, so as you can gather I always keep him on a lead, the escapade of him on the main road darting too and fro is still firmly in my head, I really thought I would lose him back then and it was all fresh in my head again as that ungrateful owner decided that his dog was ok to be off the lead.




Well even more weeks have transpired and still no blog oh! Well, I have been a busy bee, and I have been doing things like a visit to a secret nuclear bunker in the Essex countryside with Tommy two wheels and my little bro Glen, at the same time as the S.N.B there was a military show going on as well, it cost £7 to attend lots of things to see, but really was it really worth all that money? Well to answer that NO! in fact you had to pay another £5.50 to visit the S.N.B on top of the seven quid, don’t get me wrong, the money is donated to the Help the Hero’s fund, something I have already done with the Rebel smugglers for a patch for my cut off.



But it was a great day, lots of dressing up as well as serving soldiers walking around, not full timers mind you most if not all looked like T.A except for one Para, who looked like he was 3rd Para, who are mostly S.F. after 4years of service, but what a good photographic opportunity as well, lots of Germans or men pretending to be German’s with authentic uniforms, with some really neat tanks, jeeps, land rovers normal and S.F. A trader was selling softball as well as deactivated weapons brens, pistols, sub’s and ak47’s the widow makers.



Tommy 2 wheels made a remark, saying this must take you back, yes it did, all I can say is thank god I did not hear the stand too order, I would have been like a headless chicken lol.






Now the S.N.B was an interesting one, not what I expected, now walking to this place you would never think that it was nothing more than what it is a small cottage deep in the Essex forest as you can see from the photos.






You are greeted by the Essex for of Brownie special forces, taking your money with beady eyes a warm smile and giving a massive green wand that talks as you walk along the very long cold corridor for your decent into the Essex underground war rooms.



One thing that hits you as you descend is the cold its quite cold there, the wand tells you that it would have been warm if it was full with its full assortment of people around 6000 officers, MP’s and various tecks, as well as the BBC, could you imagine that broadcast?





Dear people of the UK you are screwed but we are ok, were locked up in a S.N.B unless you’re a complete Narcissist or Orphan, who would want to be in there with another 5999 people when all your loved ones are facing extinction outside?



I thought it was a bit cheeky asking for £5 to take photos thought in my defence I did not see the poster asking for this and continued to take photos, well lets face it for someone who is sick as I am and on dole money I think that £12.50 is more than a decent donation to the H.T.H





For some reason going to these shows always mean you have to spend a fortune on drinking and eating, chips £2.50 (frozen chips as well) and £1 for a can of coke, its like hotel prices, next time we go to something like that we better take a picnic as well…

Shocking!

Well its been two weeks since my last confession as a Catholic shirt stealer would day, my Uncle Tom said this many years ago to me when I was but a nipper.

Noting much of Interest has happened well when I say nothing much just little things, on the Thursday of last week my front door rings and cause I can see from my cctv who’s there, before my eyes stand two really angelic women, neatly dressed and figures that would give America’s top Model a run for there money, so intrigued I answer the door only to have the Watch tower shoved in my face by two smiling god’s own right hand girls, best thing to do is sorry I’m quite happy with my religion and send them on there way if it was men I would abuse them, sorry I just hate people coming to my door out of faith and not friendship.

I’ve really done my self proud this week I done so much work in the back garden mowing the lawn doing the edges and fixing up the beer table thought its took a full 4 days to do it and play world of Warcraft at the same time, its done even filled up our fountain, and much to the amusement and bewilderment of Obi, he’s taken to drinking out of the fountain funny guy every day he does something even more stupid or just down right funny.

I’m going to the Arthur Findley College Standstead Hall on the 30th of April for the day to see Tony Stockwell give a demonstration as well as teach medium skills, its being treaded as an open day, I wonder how they will take to me, being a biker, just hope its not a problem like sensitive people are these days, I remember many years ago, I was walking around a what you would call a new age meeting wearing my biker leathers, I like black not that I’m a dark lover or anything like that, it was all I could get from shops at the time, and being a bike rider you have to think of safety first.

Some woman at a stall took an instant dislike and commented on why I was wearing black, cause I’m a devil worshiper and work, and walk a dark path, Is that right babe? So it’s not dawned on you my clothing is to do with riding a bike? Its better to wear leather than cotton on a bike, don’t you think leather is warmer riding at 60mph around the countryside?

But I did shut her up with a well aimed put down now you must pick your timing just right with a good put down and being me I’m the best at it.

Several people are paying attention to me and her arguing over the rights and wrongs of colour my timing is impeccable So babe before you take the splinter of wood out of my eye first take the plank out of your own, smile and walk away as she trying to over come the shock, and the verbal kick in the fanny!

I think I learned something from mum concerning paying bills you know electric, gas, phone and the hated Council tax or Pox tax as me and fox calls it. Paying any bill just makes me cringe particularly the pox tax, its like giving money to abusers and yeah the government are the biggest abusers of all.

Now I have my mum’s attitude towards bills just don’t pay them till the red letter slips through the door, not that don’t want to pay I just like to keep them waiting, my mum was a wee horror when it came to paying bills she would shove the un opened bill under her seat, one day looking for pennies we were so poor, I found all the unpaid bills stacked up like it was a paper model of K2, when I challenged her about it: she just shrugged her shoulders and said, Oh well!



Well its two weeks since I last posted anything on my blog its been quite busy the nice weather has played a part big time done just about everything in the garden bringing it up to scratch mowing the law for the second time, it looks so much neater now that it did after its first cut.



While walking Obi around the field I have noticed that the farmer has put up an electric fence around the perimeter of one of his fields its no more than a foot and a half high, with warnings attached at intervals now most people that walk the field are over 5foot dogs a little smaller, unless the warning is meant for rabbits and gnomes, I’m sure there’s a few fairies dotted around but they hide so well?




Obi has taken to drinking out of the Fountain, and it’s needing filled again after being only filled 2 weeks ago, I think it need to be realigned again to much spit over the side.



I got the Bum in the Mud in a few days I’m so excited the chance to see over 2000 bikes and bikers lots of bands, food and frolics and I get to meet the rest of my group the Rebel Smugglers.

Sheering News!

Out walking Oberon today, I bumped in to Bernie from next door, he been hard at it doing his patio for the past week, I get on well with him, and both of us have heart problems, and from time to time talk health, but today we talked crime, yeah its happened again another property has be ran sacked by some hoodlums, this time it was no little property it was one of the larger houses, on our street as its called are some really hefty homes, the type you see in Hollywood, the house in question was not alarmed, how stupid is that?

And it has dogs! My god those buggers are noisy, and yet it did not deter the light fingered thief, so it just goes to show no mater how big or how unfriendly the dogs are, who ever it is, are very determined to get in, its always during the day, so the dogs could be locked away, the dogs in question are Lab’s so not built for aggression, but bark a lot.
When fox gets home from her work she going to freak, we have yet to install our alarm, I know we got our cctv but what good is that to someone who could to all intents and purposes were a mask or cover his head?

I had to take a trip into Harlow today to sign on, and had a quick dash around the Harvey centre, and there was a Essex Police stall in the centre I had a quick word with one of the officers and asked about a crime prevention officer, they took my details and promised that someone would be in contact shortly keeping fingers crossed that un-savouries eyes do not look in this houses direction.

Now for another bit of Sheering news, and like the last blog it’s about poo! Yeah it never seems to go away only this time its not about Obi eating the stuff, people have been complaining that when they walk on the fields, people just let there dogs shit all over the place and make no attempt to clear it up, I do agree this is a problem not only for the health and well being of dogs and shoes, its unsightly as well seeing a massive dog turd just smiling at you as you walk around the country side listening to the birds sing, and the sweet smell of Fido’s culinary delights plastered to your left shoe.

Now the reason I brought this up, is because of a dim wit of a woman in the general store made a comment about Obi and well of course me…

Mrs Turd: Oh! Leslie, you know that Guy next door?
Leslie: You mean in V?
Mrs Turd: yes him I think it’s his dog that shits all over the path and walkways.
(Now Leslies face goes red, she can see me standing with my fresh morning rolls)

Now Kudo’s to Leslie, she gives a classic response to her question, why don’t you ask him yourself he’s standing right behind you?

Mrs Turd apologises to Leslie and scampers out the door with my booming voice behind her, I always clean up after my dog thank you very much.

As the door slams shut, Leslie bursts into fits of laughter I must admit I found it quite funny as well, now for the sake of being a nice resident of Sheering I will not tell you her name, but simply we will from now on call her Mrs Turd.