I think we all have had an embarrassing moment once in our lifes, for me there has been a great many one that comes to mind and again this is a cemetery one like so many have had here.
I was no more than 14 years old, a close friend had passed a way in a tragic accident, his mother asked me to be a pall bearer, as well as several other chums of his, I took this as a great honor, our little group was that close, days passed, and I did not think to look at my clothing, always wearing Jeans and leather jackets and boots.
On the day of the funeral as promised i would help carry the body, Taking ages to find black trousers, the only ones I could find were a bit tight fitting, but still after much grunting and groaning I got them over my fat arse.
With some of my buddies we lift the coffin from the hearse, gingerly walking with the weight of the coffin and young body inside. we slowly walk to the grave side, the sniffing and sobs of many people, echo's in our ears.
Slowly with dignity we lower the coffin to the ground, placing it over the two sleepers that hang across the grave plot, as we stand silent and thoughtful we remember William as we had known him when he was alive.
At my feet the ropes that lower the coffin into the ground lay coiled at my feet, as the Priest finishes the sermon, we bend down to take hold of the rope, as I bend i hear a tearing sound, it drowns out the sobs from the gathered crowd, I stand there my face going bright red, I just ripped the arse out of my black trousers and to make matters worse, I did not have any underpants on!
For the first time ever, there was a hush at the grave side even Williams mother could not, fight back the laughter, I gave the Priest an eyeful, as well as lots of girls from our class room.
Friday, 12 March 2010
I keep finding my self drawn to my bike, its getting to that time of year, when my fingers get Itchy and want to grip my handle bars and fire her up, and head out onto the open road, but for some reason the weather can conspire against me, and it rains, snows and yep even hail stones all in the space of 6 weeks.
Shock and horror I noticed that my exhaust has rust on it, I will never live the shame of it if any of my fellow Rebel smugglers ever find out I let my bike get in that state, yes I covered her but for a brief time I let her have her cover off and it snowed rained hailed and just about anything god could throw at her, still she started first time and my god did she go when I took her out for a spin last week, so from today I keep promising myself to give her a good wash and polish.
But for the moment I just think about it, yeah I’m a lazy sod, but it takes training to do that. I remember once I was to lazy to put out a candle in my bedroom fell asleep, and woke to find my dresser in flames, such as life Lucky for me I had a live saver next to me a 2lt bottle of coke to dowse the flames of stupidity.
This week I would say has clicked in a way that has left me with a smile that would make evangelist worry, must be an Adams thing we can do that to people we don’t smile well not that often but when we do, it’s a sort of mix between Charles Manson and that creepy guy, in the buy my gold adverts on telly.
Since Spring is in the air, its time to do the garden for the summer you know cut this trim that tidy that shed up, but really I cant be arsed by it all, thought I have planted all my seeds for our new to be veg plot at the side of the tavern which need a good old clean but I get to that sometime soon I think, this year I am going for the usual pumpkins for Halloween and Onions I use so much in cooking, And lots of bags of Potatoes my stable diet of Chips roast pots and of course mash, this year I will have 3 different varies of potato, then there is carrots sweet corn and melons I love melons big juicy round melons mmmmm.
But I have to do the veg plot first even though a few of the seeds are starting to grow in the mini pots, if I have to I transplant them to a bigger container, this year I am giving garlic a miss, its so easy and cheep to buy in a supermarket but I am undecided still, might take a trip to the Harlow garden centre near the A12 and see what it has to offer.
I am finding this computer that I do my blog on a very old dinosaur being powered by pterodactyls (Pentium4 1gig Ram 85gig hd, and a graphics care that came out of a cereal box) I’m not one for change but this computer I feel is slowly getting to its last legs, which means all my important documents and pictures are in danger of being lost forever. I keep promising myself a new computer but money is so tight, I would be better of robbing the local church mice, they got more than me.
Funny as it seems my notebook has more power than this old thing but still its familiar to me I know my way around its large keyboard even thought the letters on the key board have long since disappeared from its face, just shows how much I have used it.
And as I talk about it I think of all the stuff I have done, Baldur’s gate, Neverwinters nights, world of warcraft, nights watching movies, on Yahoo talking to all and sundry all over the world well mostly America, the things its done been and gave to me, when its gone, it be like losing an old friend.
It was and still is my window to the world outside, Times we both froze together, simply because I kept it in a place that was so cold I had to sit on a chair wrapped in a sleeping bag with a hot water bottle at my feet to keep warm, still the computer worked like a dream always cold never hot, but never let me down, so its fitting that as I notice these little things that its time to save up and replace it.
Thursday, 11 March 2010
which picture of Obi for mothers day?
Give us a hand here please, I got so many pictures of Oberon aka Obi which one do you feel is the best for a mothers day card?
just an update of sorts
Well then here I am its just gone 10:30pm, and I’m feeling a little happy no not happy satisfied in a strange sort of way, in the space of a day I have now got 5 followers including myself yeah I’m actually following myself now strange but true I’m my own doppelganger ok laugh I am.
I spent the past couple of hours watching Man U v A C Milan, I was half expecting Milan to dominate and crush Man U, well was I in for a shock, talk about a severe humping, Milan were ManU’s bitch tonight.
Even Arsenal did a fair bit of humping of Portal as well, considering what Porto did to Celtic in the European final; they got what they deserved, even if Eduardo is a diving diva.
I got to sign on Thursday morning, and see the disability officer, its been difficult to find a job that will take me on, ever since my heart attack employment has been so difficult, no one wants me no one will take a chance on me, so its with a brave heart that again I must make my own way, not that I’m overly bothered by this in fact, I have a plan, I’m not going to go too deep into explanations about whets in my head.
But what it means in a nut shell is I will be my own boss, and I got a public I can practice on, something that I feel is missing I will explain more as the weeks and months progress.
You know this little guy looks like butter would not melt in his mouth, but in fact he is so canny at getting treats and sampling just about any thing going in the house, he is trying so hard to get on to the table tops in the kitchen, lifting the lid of Fox’s drinking cup when she is in bed asleep.
Well since I’m going to Harlow tomorrow I might take my bike for a spin, I also got the doctors as well tomorrow got to pick up my prescription for the next month, so with my trip logger you all be able to see where I been, talk about big brother watching you, its mad.
One thing that’s been playing on my mind is Mothers day on Sunday not looking forward to it, my mum passed a way a few years ago, I think of her about this time it was her birthday only a few days ago, as pointed out by my sister, was thinking of getting foxy a mothers day card from Obi? Strange but then were strange people.
On a final note thank you all, for following me, I am grateful to you all, please do comment lets get to know each other a little more I do like to share and learn more of what makes you tick.
I spent the past couple of hours watching Man U v A C Milan, I was half expecting Milan to dominate and crush Man U, well was I in for a shock, talk about a severe humping, Milan were ManU’s bitch tonight.
Even Arsenal did a fair bit of humping of Portal as well, considering what Porto did to Celtic in the European final; they got what they deserved, even if Eduardo is a diving diva.
I got to sign on Thursday morning, and see the disability officer, its been difficult to find a job that will take me on, ever since my heart attack employment has been so difficult, no one wants me no one will take a chance on me, so its with a brave heart that again I must make my own way, not that I’m overly bothered by this in fact, I have a plan, I’m not going to go too deep into explanations about whets in my head.
But what it means in a nut shell is I will be my own boss, and I got a public I can practice on, something that I feel is missing I will explain more as the weeks and months progress.
You know this little guy looks like butter would not melt in his mouth, but in fact he is so canny at getting treats and sampling just about any thing going in the house, he is trying so hard to get on to the table tops in the kitchen, lifting the lid of Fox’s drinking cup when she is in bed asleep.
Well since I’m going to Harlow tomorrow I might take my bike for a spin, I also got the doctors as well tomorrow got to pick up my prescription for the next month, so with my trip logger you all be able to see where I been, talk about big brother watching you, its mad.
One thing that’s been playing on my mind is Mothers day on Sunday not looking forward to it, my mum passed a way a few years ago, I think of her about this time it was her birthday only a few days ago, as pointed out by my sister, was thinking of getting foxy a mothers day card from Obi? Strange but then were strange people.
On a final note thank you all, for following me, I am grateful to you all, please do comment lets get to know each other a little more I do like to share and learn more of what makes you tick.
Tuesday, 9 March 2010
Am I fooling myself?
A day don’t go by that I wish I could do something exciting like cloud hopping since I got a massive field behind my house, and just jump across its vast expanse, no I’m not kidding there is a thing you can do its called cloud hopping.
And yes that is a bin being used as a ballon platform with a gas canister inside, both photos taken from the cloud hopper group i belong to.
When we were about to leave Brighton for Essex, we thought that we would at least make some money from the sale of our Patcham property but it was not to be, by then the recession kicked in and it kicked us in the balls (Literally talking if you don’t mind lol)
But it meant that I would have to put this adventure on hold, now I feel that it will never take hold, unless we sell our place which I am loathed to do, I love it here in the village.
So what’s our village like might you ask? Well it’s only got one shop, which is also a post office, off licence, bakery, confectioners and card shop, there’s a hairdresser, and a butcher as well as a small café.
Every day you see all the locals rush to get the rolls and uncut bread, that is delivered every morning at 7am prompt, unless of course its bloody snowing then it just might never arrive.
Well it feels that the cold weather is far behind us, but there is an old saying never cast clout till May is out, so although its sunny outside, its still quite chilly and mornings you can still see the frost on Athena my bike.
Well a little about Oberon and his continuing training or obedience classes, we are coming to his 4th lesson so far, there has been a little difference in his behavior and obedience he will come when asked as long as there is noting more distracting in front of his snout, which is all the time, birds, dog walkers, paper bags and family who come and visit us Uncle Glen, and Granddad Tom and Nan.
For some reason he loves to Chew Glen to bits, something that has to be addressed, poor sod comes to visit and spends what feels like ages trying to keep the little terror under control, as I dart out of the front room making tea and stuff.
Trying to gage my mood, it feels quite well low not in a depressed sense just low in a way of, well if I could put it in words I would say fed up with Twitter, I have over 114-115 followers and you can be as sure as hell only 3-8 will tweet back, it seems a lot of my followers are either robots, narrow minded or just plain stupid and working to there own agenda’s.
Now I’m one of those people who will use twitter to promote my own blog but I always have something to say, and if I see something that tickles my fancy I always respond or if its important enough re-tweet, I don’t ask for much but what I do ask for is some times people to take notice, but if they are indeed robots well they don’t have the presence of mind to do so do they?
For everything there is a solution, and I am coming to a realization that in order to reach more thru these pages, I must attempt to do a bit more work, maybe even throw out a lot of followers in twitter, so that I deal with what is important and what’s not!
I was able to get out on my bike a few days ago for 30 mins just a quick, round trip around my area, the first of the season is always the best most of my buddies tell me and they are right, but one thing that I did not count on was the frozen fingers god was that nasty, I feel I could have chewed my fingers of and would not have noticed the pain till an hour later, trying to put the key in the door when I got home was almost impossible with Obi standing there giving me the look.
During my ride I used a GPS Locator which actually records my trip out, massive I even took photos of the trip and one actually has me in it, there ya go even this old dog can learn new tricks, thought trying to get the camera to sit perfectly still pity there was so much undergrowth to deal with before I could take the picture ooh well hope you like my rout its fab and I mean fab getting out and about again after our long harsh winter.
http://www.a-trip.com/users/home/9707
Village Gossip:
Well not so much today in-fact the wait at the post office counter was very long! Having to wait in a queue of people just to pay a bill, and there is only one counter, staffed by Cogan who is such a nice guy but everyone wants to chat to him as well, so what should take no more than 2 minutes max takes 5 minutes cause he hears all the gossip, but nothing of interest today, just the usual moans and groans, from the older population of my little place called Paradise, deep in the Essex country side.
And yes that is a bin being used as a ballon platform with a gas canister inside, both photos taken from the cloud hopper group i belong to.
When we were about to leave Brighton for Essex, we thought that we would at least make some money from the sale of our Patcham property but it was not to be, by then the recession kicked in and it kicked us in the balls (Literally talking if you don’t mind lol)
But it meant that I would have to put this adventure on hold, now I feel that it will never take hold, unless we sell our place which I am loathed to do, I love it here in the village.
So what’s our village like might you ask? Well it’s only got one shop, which is also a post office, off licence, bakery, confectioners and card shop, there’s a hairdresser, and a butcher as well as a small café.
Every day you see all the locals rush to get the rolls and uncut bread, that is delivered every morning at 7am prompt, unless of course its bloody snowing then it just might never arrive.
Well it feels that the cold weather is far behind us, but there is an old saying never cast clout till May is out, so although its sunny outside, its still quite chilly and mornings you can still see the frost on Athena my bike.
Well a little about Oberon and his continuing training or obedience classes, we are coming to his 4th lesson so far, there has been a little difference in his behavior and obedience he will come when asked as long as there is noting more distracting in front of his snout, which is all the time, birds, dog walkers, paper bags and family who come and visit us Uncle Glen, and Granddad Tom and Nan.
For some reason he loves to Chew Glen to bits, something that has to be addressed, poor sod comes to visit and spends what feels like ages trying to keep the little terror under control, as I dart out of the front room making tea and stuff.
Trying to gage my mood, it feels quite well low not in a depressed sense just low in a way of, well if I could put it in words I would say fed up with Twitter, I have over 114-115 followers and you can be as sure as hell only 3-8 will tweet back, it seems a lot of my followers are either robots, narrow minded or just plain stupid and working to there own agenda’s.
Now I’m one of those people who will use twitter to promote my own blog but I always have something to say, and if I see something that tickles my fancy I always respond or if its important enough re-tweet, I don’t ask for much but what I do ask for is some times people to take notice, but if they are indeed robots well they don’t have the presence of mind to do so do they?
For everything there is a solution, and I am coming to a realization that in order to reach more thru these pages, I must attempt to do a bit more work, maybe even throw out a lot of followers in twitter, so that I deal with what is important and what’s not!
I was able to get out on my bike a few days ago for 30 mins just a quick, round trip around my area, the first of the season is always the best most of my buddies tell me and they are right, but one thing that I did not count on was the frozen fingers god was that nasty, I feel I could have chewed my fingers of and would not have noticed the pain till an hour later, trying to put the key in the door when I got home was almost impossible with Obi standing there giving me the look.
During my ride I used a GPS Locator which actually records my trip out, massive I even took photos of the trip and one actually has me in it, there ya go even this old dog can learn new tricks, thought trying to get the camera to sit perfectly still pity there was so much undergrowth to deal with before I could take the picture ooh well hope you like my rout its fab and I mean fab getting out and about again after our long harsh winter.
http://www.a-trip.com/users/home/9707
Village Gossip:
Well not so much today in-fact the wait at the post office counter was very long! Having to wait in a queue of people just to pay a bill, and there is only one counter, staffed by Cogan who is such a nice guy but everyone wants to chat to him as well, so what should take no more than 2 minutes max takes 5 minutes cause he hears all the gossip, but nothing of interest today, just the usual moans and groans, from the older population of my little place called Paradise, deep in the Essex country side.
Monday, 8 March 2010
A ghost story
Most if not all people see ghosts at night time but its not always the case, sometimes you see a ghost when you expect it, as what happened to me one day many years ago as I recount it now.
But one thing that I did was to do a video tape of it and put it on you tube so in stead of my usual reams of pages explaining it why don't I just tell you it face to face like eh!
If your not Scottish or even speak English then this will all sound really weird to you but get a pal who can talk English and enjoy the red lady.
But one thing that I did was to do a video tape of it and put it on you tube so in stead of my usual reams of pages explaining it why don't I just tell you it face to face like eh!
If your not Scottish or even speak English then this will all sound really weird to you but get a pal who can talk English and enjoy the red lady.
Wednesday, 3 March 2010
Stinking Theives!
Well its been a interesting week and not all that good from a point of view, there is a certain amount of paranoia going around, some one or a group of some ones are targeting our village, I learned from Bernie our guy next door that someone had broken into a house on the street, lots of speculation and nervous eyes watching everyone and every car that pull into the car park that sits neatly to the side of our house.
I hear it all from it was 2:15am and the low life’s went thru the front door as the two elderly people lay asleep in there bed, but in fact when I went to the local post office come General store, come gossip central, I asked one of the local girls about it, she was being unduly cagey about the whole thing and for good reason, the owner of the house that was broken into was standing right behind me.
Getting back to the house with Obi howling at me for leaving him even if its only for 2 mins, we were in the conservatory I was fixing out the stove for a nice afternoon of warmth and reading as well as keep an eye on Twitter, the door bell rings.
From the corridor I can see a woman standing holding a loaf of bread thinking did I forget to pick mine up, I open the door, the woman smiles and introduces herself.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Nab: Hello I hope you don’t mind, I was listening to your conversation with Leslie in the shop?
Me: Yes I was it was terrible to hear, I was talking to Bernie next door and he told me that someone was broken into (shaking my head in disapproval) terrible news.
Nab: Yes it is it was my house that was broken into, just thought I come and warn you that these people are around.
Me: Yes It got me worried enough to install my CCTV around my property, you can never be to safe, (I stop thinking then say) I am so sorry that its happened to you it must be horrible to think that your place was targeted and ask how did they gain access?
Nab: they came over the field behind our home, and got in thru the back window, I look at her property its got an alarm.
Me: I notice that she follows my gaze, she whispers we did not have it on, this is not unusual nothing ever happens here in our little village and when I found out about it Bernie said he has started to use his alarm as well now since the property was ransacked.
People can be too comfortable and trusting in these area’s in a macabre sort of way maybe it’s a good thing every one talking about it everyone is take added precautions making sure they don’t be come a victim myself included in all this drama, and yes its drama, the Police think it’s a group from Harlow or London that’s coming this way, and yes they did say a group, for the stuff that was taken would take more than one person to carry.
The lady told me that they made off with her Telly, two Laptops and all her jewellery the telly being a 50inch plasma although easy to carry but still its heavy unless he or they had a ruck sake of some sort to carry the rest, and considering this was in the afternoon most people would be at work at this time, still the road is very well used so someone must have seen a guy walking with a big massive telly you would think, but noo it seems he they just disappeared in to the shadows of day light!
It took me the better part of a day to fix out all the wires and place the box for the CCTV, poor obi thought I had abandoned him to his fate he could see me but could not help, he’s such a good helper like running of with anything that he can get in his mouth, or just a bloody pirate as we like to call him.
The good thing about having CCTV is I can keep watch of front and back of our little castle, though I have noticed a thief in the form of a squirrel nicking the fat balls from the tree, I don’t mind this they can be so funny lucky I had my video camera at hand and filmed him getting his chops around a fat ball, quite funny really must put it on youtube soon. As I write this its just up loaded for all to see, so far its all been good, even thought these are the guys responsible for nearly making the brown squirrel extinct but enjoy all the same
I been listening to my scanner for the past week, the air traffic is quite something else, but one thing is niggling me so much that I have to do something about it, the reception is bloody weak, I need a new aerial so I can get wider coverage, I don’t like listening to air craft one way, the control tower is far much better.
I hear it all from it was 2:15am and the low life’s went thru the front door as the two elderly people lay asleep in there bed, but in fact when I went to the local post office come General store, come gossip central, I asked one of the local girls about it, she was being unduly cagey about the whole thing and for good reason, the owner of the house that was broken into was standing right behind me.
Getting back to the house with Obi howling at me for leaving him even if its only for 2 mins, we were in the conservatory I was fixing out the stove for a nice afternoon of warmth and reading as well as keep an eye on Twitter, the door bell rings.
From the corridor I can see a woman standing holding a loaf of bread thinking did I forget to pick mine up, I open the door, the woman smiles and introduces herself.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Nab: Hello I hope you don’t mind, I was listening to your conversation with Leslie in the shop?
Me: Yes I was it was terrible to hear, I was talking to Bernie next door and he told me that someone was broken into (shaking my head in disapproval) terrible news.
Nab: Yes it is it was my house that was broken into, just thought I come and warn you that these people are around.
Me: Yes It got me worried enough to install my CCTV around my property, you can never be to safe, (I stop thinking then say) I am so sorry that its happened to you it must be horrible to think that your place was targeted and ask how did they gain access?
Nab: they came over the field behind our home, and got in thru the back window, I look at her property its got an alarm.
Me: I notice that she follows my gaze, she whispers we did not have it on, this is not unusual nothing ever happens here in our little village and when I found out about it Bernie said he has started to use his alarm as well now since the property was ransacked.
People can be too comfortable and trusting in these area’s in a macabre sort of way maybe it’s a good thing every one talking about it everyone is take added precautions making sure they don’t be come a victim myself included in all this drama, and yes its drama, the Police think it’s a group from Harlow or London that’s coming this way, and yes they did say a group, for the stuff that was taken would take more than one person to carry.
The lady told me that they made off with her Telly, two Laptops and all her jewellery the telly being a 50inch plasma although easy to carry but still its heavy unless he or they had a ruck sake of some sort to carry the rest, and considering this was in the afternoon most people would be at work at this time, still the road is very well used so someone must have seen a guy walking with a big massive telly you would think, but noo it seems he they just disappeared in to the shadows of day light!
It took me the better part of a day to fix out all the wires and place the box for the CCTV, poor obi thought I had abandoned him to his fate he could see me but could not help, he’s such a good helper like running of with anything that he can get in his mouth, or just a bloody pirate as we like to call him.
The good thing about having CCTV is I can keep watch of front and back of our little castle, though I have noticed a thief in the form of a squirrel nicking the fat balls from the tree, I don’t mind this they can be so funny lucky I had my video camera at hand and filmed him getting his chops around a fat ball, quite funny really must put it on youtube soon. As I write this its just up loaded for all to see, so far its all been good, even thought these are the guys responsible for nearly making the brown squirrel extinct but enjoy all the same
I been listening to my scanner for the past week, the air traffic is quite something else, but one thing is niggling me so much that I have to do something about it, the reception is bloody weak, I need a new aerial so I can get wider coverage, I don’t like listening to air craft one way, the control tower is far much better.
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